Falling in love is for fools.

Why isn’t there more fiction about being in love?

I’ve continued reading the Dar and Kerry novels, of which there is a whole lot, and I’m realising how incredibly lovely it is to read novels about two people in love. Most fiction at the moment seem to focus heavily or entirely on the process of falling in love. Which gets ridiculously boring. Any fool can fall in love. That’s why it’s called falling in love. It’s like tripping on your shoelaces or spilling milk on your work trousers. Happens every damn day and any fucking fool can do it. And they do. All the time. Every day. It’s tiresome. But what’s interesting, what’s heart-warming – and kind of wonderful to watch/read about is people being in love. No tired love triangles, because once again that’s about the process of falling in love and not being in love. But to get to follow two people who are in love and how they together navigate life and those obstacles, challenges and blessings that come with its territory; that’s…rare and incredibly entertaining. To get to see these two people hang on to their own selves, but also see this mutual identity that they together create as they become a satellite to the rest of our shared cosmos.

But why is that so rare and difficult to find? There are tons and tons of romance books about the first spark. There are tons of TV shows about love triangles. Dating is a plot point used for both high and low, comedy and drama. But where are the stories about couples who share a strong and healthy love for each other who are exposed to drama without destroying the bond that tie them together. I feel like people generally discard the idea because of some strange notion that it’s boring. Which I don’t get. What’s boring is watching the exact same “falling in love” stories over and over again. What’s not boring is watching/reading good chemistry put to use and give another dimension to occurrences that could otherwise be boring. Nothing puts an entertaining spin on life as good chemistry.

I’m not saying it can’t be interesting to watch two people fall in love and find each other, because it can be if it’s handled well. I just wish there was more focus on chemistry and the exploration of chemistry in fiction rather than this overemphasis on arbitrary conflict created by unoriginal storytellers. Because love is more than the initial spark and sexual attraction. Love is a weirdass animal that transforms and transcends yet is so mundane it can be hurtful. A contradicting little stranger I enjoy reading about and watching on film. Unfortunately I seldom get the opportunity.

Which is yet another reason I enjoy and admire Missy Good’s Dar and Kerry series. We quite quickly get the falling bit over with and then get to spend 5+ books discovering and exploring their world and what it means for them to be in love. How that affects them and those around them. That shit is interesting. It’s escapism with hurdles to make it into a surprising journey. There is never any real doubt about the strength of their relationship, but neither is it ever boring because the world around them never stagnates even if they share a solid and immovable foundation. It sounds like such a contradiction but it is possible to show the dynamic nature of something cemented. And I find myself coming back to it time and time again, and wish I could find it in more places.

Happily ever after shouldn’t be a closing tag, it should be the actual story. Because it is a lot more interesting than people give it credit for.

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~ by Ape on February 3, 2013.

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